That One Chick #8

Before the day of the digital camera–you had to point and shoot and cross your fingers hoping that when you got your film back your children wouldn’t look…like…this. It was always a crap shoot with no do overs.
Check out the little monkey on the left.
Speaking of monkeys…
When I was about this age–6 or 7ish we had a neighbor in Los Angeles that kept all kinds of monkeys. No lie. She had chimpanzees and spider monkeys and kept them in a huge playroom-pen at the front of the yard that she called the Monkey House. We could see them swinging on rings and jumping around from our kitchen window. Pretty sure there would be something illegal about that these days. Anyway, one day we came home to find the biggest and baddest grandaddy monkey of all time sitting on top of our fridge. His name was Beatnick and he apparently came in through our open kitchen window. When we came in the kitchen, he stood up and started screeching and throwing fruit down on us. My brother had a potato growing in a jar with toothpicks and water–the little dope threw that too.
My dad yelled, “Everybody stand still,” so we stood still. Too bad the chimp didn’t listen.

That creepy guy jumped right down and landed…
on my head.
So, try to picture it–two big old monkey feet clutching the top of my head–his toes were poking me in the eyes. Not to mention the fact that a monkey the size of a toddler weighs about as much as a 10 year old child. Before I could yell or bawl or help myself in any way, he sprung from my head to the kitchen table–knocking me to the floor. My dad picked me up and tossed me out of the kitchen. Pretty scary–I must say.
I have no idea how my dad got the monkey out of our house, but for years–any time he’d see a chimpanzee on T.V. he’d say, “Those little devils are as strong as a grown man.”
All I know is that they are as heavy as a sack of bricks…
when they land on your head.

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