Blink~The Graduate

I suppose I’ve been driving this route for some time now.

Ooooh-whoo. Seven fifteen a.m. every morning for the past one hundred years.

Perhaps I exaggerate just a tad–but you get the point.

I’ve taken this road in the pouring rain…

thick and spooky fog……

and slippery, blinding, icy snow.

Driven it before daylight savings time when it was so dark outside the streetlights were still on.

With all the windows down in the summer when the cooler wouldn’t work.

In the winter with blankets wrapped around our shoulders and heads and feet because the heater wouldn’t kick in.

Attended every football game, track event, and choir concert humanly possible.

Grumbled now and then about the caffeine-induced erratic drivers or teenage pedestrians with a “you-know-you-won’t-hit-me” death wish, and the ridiculous youngsters that really shouldn’t have a license in the first place—as we all converged here in this very parking lot—before any decent human being should even be out of bed.

Sat, crocheting in this holding space for hours at a time, doing that mama thing we call waiting, sometimes alone and sometimes while my beloved cargo spent some needed time…with their mom.

Sat, idling along with the car, staring at this tinted glass door–that far away one between the cars–looking for any sign of Daney boy, or the bald kid.

Oh, the laughing and talking and listening and teasing andΒ  heartbreaks and secrets and real earth life we’ve had at this place.

All to end up here. One. Very. Last. Time.

The bald kid thinks that I’ll be so glad to sleep in. He thinks that I’ll be relieved to save so much gas in the car. He’s sure I’m happy to see it all be finally–after 24 years and 5 kids—over.

I’m afraid he’s very…

very….

wrong.

And when that alarm clock doesn’t go off at 6:30 am any more, it won’t matter…

because I’ll already be awake…

wishing that it would…

just one more time.

Off to school—1996

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Week 11 Food storage prompt:

10 lbs. sugar, 1 lb salt

11 Replies to “Blink~The Graduate”

  1. What a very sweet post. Aren’t you feeling somewhat relieved though?? How was graduation? I bet your family whistled and cheered the loudest!

    I know what you can do at 6:30 AM. Just keep setting that alarm and hit the pavement with me and Laurie O. We are going to start doing hills on our morning walks now and I will be driving right by your house on our way to the hill up the street. You just be out on that corner cheeka and I will pick you up. Don’t tell me no.

  2. I was bawling half way down because I knew exactly where you were going with this. Do you suppose there’s something wrong with us or is it okay to wish every now and then that our little circle could just stay put? For what it’s worth I’d jump at the offer for the walking buddies – you won’t believe what good therapy it is! I’ve tried to entice anyone here to go with me but no takers yet and so I remain a slacker, but that’s about to change – check in with me next week.

  3. I can’t believe it! He has grown into such a great man. You have done a great job with your kids. πŸ™‚

  4. πŸ™ It’s so weird to have it be ending!… (Note to self: think of something different before the tears come… AGAIN)

    You used to meet me over by the seminary or pick me up in the front of the school everyday when you weren’t volunteering my Sophomore year. Not to mention how you took me to student council everyday M-TH in 9th grade… or 1-2 a week when it was your turn to drive for Yearbook staff… Or the other million times after track and other various school activities since I starting going to school…

    What a good Mom you are πŸ™‚ Love you!

  5. It’s funny how we all get sooo emotional about it, and he’s totally ok with it! πŸ˜‰ I was always one of the kids crying at the last this and the final that. I was a sucker for the songs about it and everything… and here I am crying about someone ELSE’S graduation. Wow.

    It’s weird. I thought I would feel more grown up than I do when we were all in this spot. I’m excited, like always, for the future, but my hands are always full holding onto the past. I need a bigger backpack to keep my treasures in! πŸ™‚

    I love you. What a great post.

  6. That makes me cry. I’m really trying to contain myself, but it’s making my throat hurt. You are a wonderful mom, and one I know I will always strive to be like. You have raised such wonderful children and supported them in all the things they’ve done. How lucky all of your children are to have you. Now you can start a whole new “beginning” to the rest of your life. I’m excited to see the wonderful things to come. I love you aunt Launi.Thanks for making a beautiful post.

  7. I love the post, but you really don’t have that long before you can be the grandma that volenteers at the Elementary school. You can start all over and love it even more the second time, if you want to. πŸ™‚

  8. I like this. I only have a one-year-old, but I had feelings like that when I graduated from high school and college. It is hard to move on, but I’m grateful for my past opportunities.

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